post funny jokes

here you can post funny jokes you know

how do you make an instant elephant????

Open the package, add water, and run!
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what has 6 legs, 3 ears, 4 tusks and 2 trunks???

an elephant with spare parts!!!
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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the
drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts
crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here,
I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall
asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When
I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police
said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I
leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab
driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the
gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was
thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my
poison."

oh and these too :

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks
into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in
bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the
girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up
and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his
wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He
probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I
saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't
complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he
nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry,
he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas
whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and
asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be
strong honey. I love you too!!"
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A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them
falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are
rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency
services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”

The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”

There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “Okay, now what?”

A wizard was in a tv show and for his last trick he sent some one from the public he said to him to hit him with a sludgehammer he whisperd in his ear and said its a trick the man hit him he went to the hospital after ten days the wizard started to move the man was impressed the the wizard said -ta-ta

ha...ha...ha dilor

lol nice ones guys how about this
what is the mix betwen jaz and punk????

its junk

put that in the favorite song topic please it is "spam" that kind of music exists for real

no its not a spam its a joke byt u dont understand that

lol i was joking "junk" music exists for real???

Does anybody have any good blonde jokes? (:

ok i'll post some but not now....i think i had some in my pc somewhare

hehe nice football player ... i see he is in shape hahahahahaha

ok since we hav a funny pic topic i will put a funny video topic but there we don't have to rate who's video is the best just put funny videos

if u wat u can post only the link of vid if it is in u tube

ha ha what about this whats the name of the spanish stomach doctores its dolores de panca (stomach ache)

haha you have to know a little italian to get this joke dolor( ache or pain)lol

a doctor had an afair with his nurse and when she was ready to give birth the doctor sent her to itali and she must give him a cartoline when she will give birh and 2 months later a cartoline came the doctors wife had no idea there was a cartoline with a spagheti picture the doctor read macaronies 2 with sausages to without sausages